Camp Camp
by Falling-Inside
Summary: When homophobic Naruto gets caught defacing their rival school's walls, he's sent to volunteer at a camp. However, he didn't know he was going to get stuck in a cabin with a transvestite, a gay, a girl with gender dysphoria and a male lesbian. GaaNaru
1. Chapter 1

**Okay. Here's the first chapter to my first FanFic. I hope people enjoy it.**

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This seemed like such a good idea when we arranged it. Hell, it was partly my fault. I was the one who came up with this stupid plan. But we had to get them back, they'd defaced Hoppy, our froggy mascot. We had to rescue our pride back, we had to take their's away. We had to prove that the students of Konoha High were the top dogs. Not a force to reckoned with. And, of course, as team captain, it was my duty to prove our top doggyness.

My fingers tightened around the cold, metal spray can. Perhaps I should've worn gloves -- I didn't want to leave sticky fingerprints behind. Somehow, the easy part was breaking into Iwa High -- We climbed through a window which was loose around the back of the school -- the hard part was pushing my finger down on the spray can's top and defacing their walls.

_Tch_. "Hey, Naruto, pick up. Over," Kiba, the wide receiver, said.

I pulled the walkie-talkie from my left pocket and held it inches from my face. "Naruto here. Over."

_Tch_. "Are you done yet?"

I pressed the black button down on the little, yellow box again. "Not yet."

_Tch_. "Hurry up," Sasuke, the corner back, added.

"I'm going as quickly as I can. Give me a break."

Just spray it. Who's going to know it was you? Whispered the demon beside my ear. Little demon Naruto stood tall with his three inch height and pitchfork at the poking ready. After all, the students and teachers of Iwa High would've been tucked up safely in their beds. That's where I wished I were. Tucked up in bed. Warm. Not standing in the main hallway of our rival school. This was breaking and entering and vandalising all in one. I was going to go to jail. Goodbye, scholarship. Goodbye, afternoons picking up chicks at the mall. The only things I'd have to worry about in the future was not dropping the soap.

Wind howled down a corridor when the entrance doors creaked open. I twisted on my heel and caught a glimpse of a flashlight. The circular beam pointed at me and closed in, making me shade my eyes with my hand. It was the pigs! I was going to have to start learning to glue soap to my hands.

"Naruto, what're you doing just standing there?" Sasuke, the bastard, whispered.

I placed a hand over my chest. "You almost gave me a heart attack, bastard. I thought you were the police."

He strolled down the corridor as if we were visiting and his dark shadow appeared lighter the closer to me he came. "Don't be such an imbecile. Kiba's on watch."

I nodded. "Right." And lifted the can. Now I had to do it. I wasn't going to let Sasuke use this against me. He was already on the prowl to become captain, and I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of my chickening out now.

Black paint stained the walls as I moved the can in order to write, "Iwa High Sucks Balls." Juvenile, I know, but I didn't really have time to think of something more poetic. I shook the can, letting the little ball inside rattle around, and used the last of the black paint. They were going to be pissed in the morning. It would be the first thing everyone would see when entering their precious, little school. Konoha High ruled! Perhaps that's what I should've written, "Konoha High Rules!" But then it would've been too obvious that the perpetrator was someone from our school, and they'd definitely pinpoint it to the football team -- and as football captain, I'd be suspect number one. I might as well have signed it if I did that. Naruto Uzumaki was no fool. I wasn't going to get caught. Dropping soaps wasn't going to be my worry.

"Stop daydreaming, dumbass." Sasuke pulled at my elbow. "I've already thrown the toilet paper around the corridors, let's go before we _do_ actually get ourselves caught."

Oh, Sasuke. He was a _rebellious_ one. I mean, who ever would've came up with chucking bog roll around the place? Psh. At least that could be cleared up easily, my little stunt was going to take hours of scrubbing to get rid of, meaning hours more of seeing, "Iwa High Sucks Balls." Because they did, it was only fair to let them know.

We left the ball sucking school the same way we entered -- through the loose back window. They seriously had to get that thing seen to. Anyone could break in, and they wouldn't want that. Oh, wait. Too late.

When our feet hit the gravel outside, I switched my torch off and pulled my black and orange jacket closer to me with curling fingers. The wind was bitter, but what did I expect at 2am in the morning? Another pair of feet flung gravel up into the air as someone began running, and Kiba turned the corner dressed in his black get-up. We gave him the thumbs up and we were off.

And we'd gotten _off _scot-free -- or so I thought.

I just wished I'd known that our little stunt was going to lead to me missing two weeks of summer.

* * *

The last day of school before summer vacation was something we all looked forward to. I mean, what's better than twelve weeks of nothing but sun, sand and babes. And there was one perk to being quarterback and team captain -- the chicks digged it. I had my pick of the cheerleaders, but why would I want to be tied down with one girl?

My shoulders ached as the pads dug into my skin. I'd been wearing the damn uniform for hours. I chucked the ball to Sasuke, who passed it to Kiba. You couldn't really call it practice -- we were just goofing around on the field and lapping up the attention from the students sat on the bleachers. Our little spray paint antics were already the talk of the school, it really was amazing how word spread so quickly. We were sat in third period when whispers began spreading throughout the class, and by the time I hit study hall, everyone was patting me on the back. Sasuke wasn't happy -- no one had mentioned the toilet paper streamed around Iwa's corridors.

Kiba gripped the ball between his fingers before turning his head toward the bleachers. A grin crawled onto his face and he lifted a leg before throwing the ball at full speed toward one of the students who was attempting to scuttle away. I scrunched my eyes when it made contact -- that was bound to hurt. It smacked the kid straight on the back of his head, knocking him into the dirt. His long hair covered his face and he only had the chance to push it to one side before Kiba was in front of him.

"Haku," he said, peering down at the boy with hunger in his eyes and venom on his tongue. "I thought we'd already had a little chat about you coming to the bleachers?"

The brunet's teeth gritted together, and his fingers curled into the dirt as he obviously tried to think of a way to get out of trouble. "Kiba--"

"Faggots aren't welcome here, rainbow patch." Kiba's shoe flicked soil over the boy when he kicked at the mud.

"I was just passing," Haku said in his usual timid voice. His sense of dress didn't win him any brownie-points. His tight, black jeans and flowery shirt might as well have been a sign, 'human punching bag'. I chuckled as Haku was lifted by his collar.

"Oi, Naruto." Kiba turned his head to look at me from over his shoulder. "Care to help me escort our little friend to where he belongs?"

"It would be my pleasure," I said, grabbing hold of the faggot's elbow. "Anywhere in particular?"

Kiba rubbed at his chin. "Toilet town sounds good. And guess what, buddy?" He patted Haku's cheek. "Your head has a VIP invitation."

"And--" We hoisted him from the ground. "--You're riding first class the whole way. Thank you for flying the Uzumaki Express. Next stop, flush city." I grinned as the few girl standing around us giggled at my joke.

"Let go." The fairy tried to rip himself free, but he was no match for one of us, so with me and Kiba together he had no hope.

We'd barely made it ten feet before a voice called my name, causing a cold tingle to run my spine. "Naruto." It was our principal, Ms. Tsunade. And if anyone ever said her bark was worse than her bite, they'd be lying. Her bite was worse than her bark. I dropped Haku's elbow, letting him straighten himself up and get away. Why did the saying, 'don't play with your food' suddenly enter my mind? "My office. Now." She turned on her heel and was gone before I could even open my mouth to respond.

"Dude," Kiba said as he placed a hand on my shoulder. "What's that all about?"

"I have no idea," I said as I watched her retreating back. Well, no point keeping her waiting. Perhaps she'd go easier on me if I didn't delay the meeting. I sighed. "Catch you later."

"Later, dude."

The office door creaked when I opened it, almost as if it were warning me. Doom. Doom. Creak. Run away! But I entered anyway. Even if it was the last day of school, she'd still probably find a way to my house just to give me a lecture about… well, about whatever I was there for. I mean, I knew my attendance wasn't great, but it wasn't bad enough to be called into her office for.

The principal from hell sat behind her desk with her fingers folded together. The look in her eyes told me I was about to be eaten alive whether I liked it or not. But she wasn't the only person in the room. Standing on my side of the desk was Gai -- my overly enthusiastic football coach. And two other guys I'd never seen before. I tilted my head, letting my blond hair fall slightly as I stared at them and they stared at me.

"Come in properly, boy," Ms. Tsunade said when I made no motion to move from the doorway. My feet shuffled into the room, unfortunately, bringing my body with them. The door creaked shut again behind me, making me jump when it slammed on its hinges. "I presume you know why you're here."

I shook my head. "Ugh…" Was that a rhetorical question? I had no fucking idea!

She opened a draw, pulled something out, and a wallet landed open on her desk. I felt my eyes widen as I peered down at the driving licence sticking out from behind a see-through plastic cover. I subconsciously patted at my pants pocket. My wallet! "Where'd you…" I looked back at the two strange men in the room. No way.

"I think I can answer that," the oldest man said as he crossed his burly arms. "It's a shame we have to meet under these circumstances, Naruto. I saw you playing against our school the other week. You're a very talented player. It's a shame that you were stupid enough to get yourself a criminal record so early in your career. You could've gone far."

I stepped back slightly, fingers twitching at my side. How the fuck can you glue soap to your hand? It's too slippery and would fall off the second it got wet. I was going to get bum raped in prison! I knew it. He must've been Iwa High's principal. "I must've dropped it," I mumbled to myself, not intending for the others within the room to hear.

"Naruto, how could you show such unyouthful behaviour? You have disgraced your coach." Gai wept, tears running onto his green jumpsuit.

"They defaced Hoppy," I said weakly. It seemed like such a lame excuse now. I'd been caught, I wasn't going to rat on the others, and now I was going to get arrested for it. I could've cried.

"We should've called the police on you for breaking into my school and spray painting such… things on our walls." I winced. "However, we have spoken to your principal and coach and have come up with an agreement." His eyes narrowed into slits and I could tell that this wasn't an agreement he'd accepted lightly. "It seems getting the police in on this would bring bad press for Konoha High, and I don't believe your principal should suffer because of you."

Ms. Tsunade nodded, blinking at the same time as her head moved. "Unfortunately, if you don't accept this arrangement then we will have to get the police involved."

"What do I have to do?" I asked, feeling uncomfortable standing in the smallish room with my large shoulder pads on. The uniform wasn't the most comfortable thing for standing around and doing nothing in. It made you stand funny with your arms pushing lightly outwards.

The other unknown man in the room spoke up now. "I'm Iwa's coach, but I also own a camp which lasts for two weeks starting the day after tomorrow. We aren't a very big group of people, and so funds are very low and we run on volunteers. Volunteers which we seem to be very low on this year. I hope you understand where this is going?"

I nodded. Well, two weeks of teaching younger kids how to play football didn't seem like a punishment. It was the sort of thing I'd volunteer to do if I knew about it, anyway. It was strange how I'd never heard about it before, though. I mean, football camps were usually very big in this area. "I'll do it," I said.

"You will?" Iwa's coach asked, seeming slightly surprised.

"Yes," I said slowly, turning my head. "I'll do it."

Iwa's coach smiled. "That's wonderful news." Iwa's principal didn't seem to happy, and Ms. Tsunade seemed very amused. What the hell was so funny, and why did I suddenly feel as if there was something they weren't telling me?

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**First chapter is up. Please review if you enjoyed it. I'll be uploading the next chapter tomorrow or the day after.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Second Chapter. I really enjoyed writing this one :D**

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The curtains were closed when I got home. I dumped my school bag and football uniform beside the front door before following the trail of crisps littering the wooden floor. One crisp. Two. Crack. I narrowed my eyes and lifted my foot to watch little bits of potato chip flake from the bottom of my shoe. "Naruko!" That damn younger sister of mine was going to be the death of me. I pushed the door open to the front room and swung open the curtains.

She hissed from her position on the sofa, pulling the duvet up over her head. "It burns," she whined. She threw the cover from her head and smoothed out her long, blonde pigtails before a second head popped from the duvet beside her.

"What's he doing here?" I asked, turning my nose up.

"We're watching a film," my sister said, pointing at the TV.

I twisted my gaze to the small TV set in the corner of the room and scrunched my face. Why, oh, WHY, did my sister have to be the biggest Fag Hag this side of Konoha? I switched the TV off just as the gay couple on the screen began a make-out session. Seriously, that stuff shout be outlawed.

"I was watching that, jockstrap," the boy beside her snapped when the screen went black. He jolted his head, flicking his light red strands out of his eyes. You know, I used to think he was pretty cool before overhearing a conversation about him sucking some guy's todger.

"Sasori, get the hell out of my house. This is a 'No Gay' zone." I crossed my arms, hoping my towering figure and scowl was enough to intimidate him. No such luck. Any batty-boy at school would've been running a mile a minute just at the sight of me, but not Sasori. Since he was my sister's best friend, he was the one guy I couldn't do anything to… and he knew that. The damn bastard new it was smooth sailing.

His soft eyes blinked slowly at me before he turned away, yawning.

"Naruto, you're such an idiot! Sasori's allowed here whenever he wants. This isn't just your house, you know." Oh, don't I know it. If it were my house I wouldn't have fucking tampons and pictures of half-naked guys all over the joint. The little brat stuck her tongue out at me and crossed her arms with a 'humph'.

"Whatever. You have to clear up the mess you left all over the hallway. You've left potato chips all over the floor."

"I'll do it in a minute." She pulled a remote control out from under the pink duvet and pointed it at the set, and I was immediately struck with the sound of spit swapping. She squealed in her high pitch fan girl voice. "They're so kawaii!" Sasori nodded eagerly beside her.

"Naruko, how many times do I have to tell you? You're not Japanese, stop using words you can't even pronounce properly. It's fucking annoying." I cleared my throat and batted my eyelashes. "They're so kawaii. Baka. Teme. Saggoi." I thought it was an awesome impression of her… she obviously didn't think so.

The remote came hurtling toward my head, and I only just managed to dodge it. Football skills did come in handy in real life, after all. I collapsed on the smaller sofa, defeated. "You gonna hog those chips, or what?" I mumbled, kicking my shoes off.

The bag landed in my lap as she tossed it across the room. "Is it true?" she asked.

"Is what--" I popped a potato chip into my mouth and crunched. "--true?"

"Was it really you who broke into Iwa High last night and spray painted 'Iwa High Sucks Balls' all over the lockers?"

I grinned triumphantly and nodded. "The one and only."

Her eyes sparkled. "And is it true that you used kung fu to beat up all the security guards, and then danced around a fire on their roof singing Indian songs with your belts around your heads?"

I choked on the little bits of food trying to slide down my throat. "The fuck? Who the hell said that?"

She shrugged innocently. "That's what everyone's saying." Can anyone say, 'Chinese Whispers?'

"Well, that part's not true. We snuck through a back window and left after spray painting the lockers."

Sasori nudged Naruko in the arm. "I told you your brother didn't know kung fu." He turned his head toward me and smiled. Why did I always get crept out whenever that boy smiled? "I also heard about your genius wallet losing skills. A normal person wouldn't have taken anything that could fall out their pockets when sneaking into a building."

"You were caught?" Naruko asked while extending her hands for the chip packet.

I tossed it back to her. "Yeah." I narrowed my eyes when Sasori started laughing. He had to be the most annoying gay guy I'd ever met in my life. "Why are you always here, anyway? Don't you have family to bug the hell out of?" Sasori's eyes scrunched and he turned away. "Oh, yeah. I forgot, your dad doesn't want anything to do with you, does he? Can't say I blame him, to be honest."

"Naruto!" I cringed when Naruko's shrill voice echoed around the room. Seriously, I think my ears started bleeding from the inside. "You're such an insensitive bastard!"

"Mind your mouth, you're too young to swear."

Sasori placed a hand on Naruko's shoulder. "It's okay. It's not his fault he's an _ignorant_ bastard; it's society's." Well, look at him trying to act all high and mighty.

"Are they calling the police?" Naruko asked when Sasori let go of her shoulder.

"Nah." I put my feet up on the wooden table in the middle of the room. "I have to volunteer at some football camp starting the day after tomorrow, though."

"That's not too bad," she said, popping a chip into her mouth. "Things could've been much worse." I wished she wouldn't talk with her mouth full. I guessed so did Sasori, since he was the one having to wipe half eaten food from his face. "So, are you gonna do it?"

"Of course I am. I don't need a criminal record at this age."

"Yeah," Sasori said. "You want to wait until you're a little older for that. You'll probably end up getting caught shoplifting cans of beer or something."

"Didn't you know it was illegal to commit sodomy until you're twenty-one? You're probably breaking the law every night."

"I stay here most nights, dimwit."

"You better not be fucking guys under my roof, because if I find out you are--"

"Naruto!"

I clamped my hands over my ears. "Naruko, turn the volume down. Sheesh."

"Don't you have some packing to do?" she asked, narrowing her eyes into slits.

I fanned a hand. "It can wait."

She turned the TV up. _"Liam, do you have any lube?"_

Fuck that shit. "Actually, I probably should get started."

"That's what I thought."

* * *

I dumped my last bag in the back of my red Chevrolet Aveo and slammed the car boot's door shut. It was typical that I was leaving on the same day Sasuke was having a party at his parents' beach house. I sighed, thinking about all the drink and chicks I was missing out on. Why the hell was I the only one caught? The little demon Naruto on my shoulder was beginning to think that grassing on Sasuke and Kiba wasn't such a bad thing. At least I'd have them to keep me company at this damn camp. I'd pick beer and babes over little, snotty kids any day.

"Is that everything?" Naruko asked, sucking on the straw in her slushy. The frozen cherry liquid moved up the clear plastic and entered her mouth.

I leaned on my car and stuff my hands in my pant's pocket to pull the keys out. "Yeah, that's everything."

She nodded, passing the slushy to Sasori. I wasn't lying when I said that boy was at our house most the time. I didn't think he'd even gone home since school finished for summer vacation two days ago. I shaded my eyes from the burning sun with one hand and scratched at my arm with the other. My orange shirt was the only thing keeping my chest from burning.

"Now, we've been through the rules, right?" I asked, giving a sceptical look to the both of them.

The two nodded in unison and recited the rules which I'd stuck to the fridge with a magnet. "No parties. No alcohol. No staying up all night. And no making the house a mess."

I raised a brow at Sasori. "And?"

He sighed while rolling his droopy eyes. "No guys around."

I pointed at Naruko. "That means you, too."

She raised a hand to her head in mock-salute. "Yes, captain buzz-kill."

I pushed myself off the car and circled it to open the driver's door. "I was your age once, so I know you're going to break every single rule on that list just to spite me." They grinned. "So I took the liberty of asking our neighbours to check up on you when you least expect it." Their grins turned upside-down. "I knew that would please you." I flicked a hand in a little wave. "Catch you in two weeks."

I pulled my map out from the glove compartment and stretched it out on the wheel as Naruko and Sasori went back inside. I'd mapped out my root the night before, so all I had to do was follow the black line I'd drawn throughout the roads. It wasn't that far, just a little out from Konoha near some wooded area. The drive took longer than I thought it would. I assumed it would take three hours tops. Boy, was I wrong. It took me six LONG hours to get there since there was a massive clog up on the motor way. The only things I had to accompany me were the Mac Donald's wrappers from my lunch and Leona Lewis singing through my car's speakers.

After those six LONG hours, I finally pulled into a little dirt road which led me to the camp's base. The place didn't look too bad. I'd never been to camp myself, so I didn't really have anything to compare it to, personally, but it looked pretty camp-ish. I put the car into second gear as I rolled it slowly down the small, bumpy road -- knocking over one of the campers would definitely land me in prison.

My head hit the roof of the car as I was jogged up and down. Up and down. Up and down. Then finally the road smoothed out into grass and I parked up beside other cars which I guessed came from the other camp counsellors. After climbing out the oppressing car, which, did I mention, I'd been in for six LONG hours, I cracked my neck, stretched my arms and kicked my legs out.

Right, now I had to find that Iwa coach guy -- whatever his name was. I lifted the boot door and flung my bags over my shoulders. Bags containing my football kit, normal clothes, swimming clothes, snacks, etc. All basic camp necessities.

I stumbled and slumped toward the campsite, being weighed down by bags. A long poll without a flag stood in the centre of the site, and cabins were strewn around the outsides with small wooden fences keeping them within the camp.

"Ah, Naruto. I'm glad you made it." I dropped the bag I was holding in my hands and shook the Iwa coach's hand.

"Hey… um."

"Naiya." He smiled. He wore a green pair of knee length shorts and a dark green shirt with a light green cap. "I'll let you settle in your cabin before I give you the ins and outs of this place. I'll also give you a timetable for the activities and a rundown of your position here."

"Right," I said. This place didn't seem too bad. At least I'd be able to say that I'd finally been to camp -- which was almost like a ceremony thing that all kids had to go through at some point. "I've brought my own football kit, so I won't have to borrow one." I laughed. "My size can be a bit hard to find."

"Your football kit?" He tilted his head slightly.

"Yeah." I picked my bag back up, making sure the ones on my shoulders didn't slip down my arms. "Which cabin's mine?" I guess it was time to meet the tots.

"Uh. You're in cabin four. There should be a bed free in there for you." He pointed to a cabin on the far end of the camp. Just… set your things up and come and see me. I'll be in the counsellor's staff cabin. It's just over there." He pointed in the opposite direction.

"Righty-o." I nodded, unable to wave with my hands full, and turned to settle in. I stepped over the logs in the middle of the green field which I suspected was where the campfire would be, and strolled toward my home for the next two weeks. I glanced over the wooden hut and kicked the steps leading up to it. It seemed sturdy enough. I gave my nod of approval and climbed the three small steps before opening the door -- which was a task with my hands full of bags. I nudged it open farther with my shoulder and almost tripped over a bag sitting in the middle of the floor.

Bunk beds. I hated bunk beds. I sighed before dumping my bags on the only bed without bags and clothes littering the covers. With only one small window and the door closed, the cabin wasn't really flooded with light. I collapsed on the bottom bunk I'd claimed as my own and turned toward the other occupants of the room for the first time. I didn't know if there were certain formalities I was supposed to abide by, so I just jumped into an introduction. "Hello, happy campers." I grinned. "I'm your personal counsellor for the next two weeks. The name's Naruto Uzumaki." My grin twitched a little when the four other people in the room looked up at me. These weren't little kids.

"Yo," one boy in a baggy hoody said. He lifted his head which had been shielded in the shadow of his cap's flap. "I'm Saku."

"It's nice to meet you--" I took a closer look. A few strands of pink hair hung out the cap. Hold up… "You're a girl!"

"Biologically, yes."

I shook my head. "This is a guy's cabin, what're you doing in here?"

"I think they thought she _was_ a guy, sweetheart."

I turned to the guy who'd just spoken… and my eye twitched. This guy was wearing lipstick… and was that a girl's cardigan? "What the fuck are you supposed to be?"

"Have you never seen a tranny before?" Saku said.

I chocked on a stone of saliva. "A what?" I stood from my bunk. "What the fuck is going on here? Who are you people?"

Saku put her hand up. "Transgender."

The short, black-haired guy who looked oddly like Sasuke put his hand up. "Transvestite."

My fingers twitched.

The red-haired guy with a strange tattoo on his forehead tucked his hands behind his head as he lay on the bunk atop mine. "Gay."

I pointed to the guy in the bunk above Saku's who sat cross legged while gripping onto his feet. "You. What about you?"

He tugged on his green shirt while looking at me with his large, bug-shaped eyes. "And I'm a lesbian."

My whole head twitched to the side.

"What are you?" Saku asked.

I grabbed my bags and threw them back over my shoulders. "Me? I'm out of here."

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**Next chapter should be up tomorrow.**

**Review if you liked it **


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for my reviews.**

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"You!" I pointed a finger at Naiya while he sat on a swivel-chair behind a desk within the counsellors' staff room. "What the fuck is this place?"

"Ah, I was hoping I'd have the chance to speak to you before you found out."

"Found out what?! That this is a camp full of freaks?"

"Oi, watch your mouth, young man. Those _freaks_ are people, too." The features on his face contorted into a scowl.

I shook my head. "I thought this was a football camp. I can't stay here. I just-- there has to be another way to repay Iwa High back."

Naiya sighed. "I can't force you to stay here, and I think I should've told you what this camp was before you arrived." He thinks? "I'm sorry that you feel unable to stay here. It really says a lot about your character." What was that supposed to mean?

"I'm sure we can come up with some other community service. Perhaps you could pitch in with unpaid work by cleaning the school over the summer."

I nodded. "Yes. That I can do."

"Very well." He sighed. "I was really hoping for the extra pair of hands--" did he mean something by that? "-- we are very under staffed this year, and since this camp is for a very small minority, we don't get much funding."

I wanted to say sorry, but I wasn't going to let him guilt-trip me into staying. I couldn't. I just couldn't . "Thank you," I said, picking my bags back up and leaving the staff room.

* * *

Eight hours. Eight! That's how long it took me to drive back home. Fucking rush hour. I pulled up outside my house and climbed out. Well, the place still looked in one piece. It was late, so I left the bags in the car so I could bring them in in the morning. I'd already spent most the day lugging them from point A to point B, and I refused to drag them anywhere else today.

I shoved my key in its hole, unlocked the door and strolled in, letting the door close behind me. None of the lights were on downstairs, so I grabbed a drink of water from the kitchen and trudged up the stairs to find my sister and the gay. I shook my head. I'd much rather have to put up with one dysfunctional boy than a whole camp of them.

My sister's light was on, so I gave a little knock before walking in. Naruko was laying on her bed with Sasori leaning his head on her stomach. They could've been mistaken as a couple, and if it were anyone but Sasori, I would've kicked the guy's ass.

"Your back early," Naruko said.

"What happened?" Sasori asked, lifting his head from my sister's stomach. "They not let juvenile delinquents teach little kids anymore?"

"Actually, if you must know, it was full of your kind." I leaned up against the wall and picked at a hangnail that had come loose while lugging my stuff around.

"My kind?"

I ripped the nail off with my teeth and spat it out the door, gaining a displeased look from the both of them -- must've been a girl thing. "It was a camp for gays."

They blinked. They blinked again. They blinked for the third time… and then, to my displeasure, they almost fell off the bed laughing.

"Seriously?" Sasori gasped out through his laughter. "And they didn't tell you?"

"Do you think I would've gone if they'd told me?"

"Fair point."

"Now I have to spend my summer cleaning that bloody High school."

Sasori sat up and threw his legs off the side of the bed. "Why don't you just stick out the two weeks?"

"Because unlike you, I don't feel comfortable staying in a cabin full of guys who probably want to fuck me."

"Please." He fanned a hand at me and turned his head away. "What makes you think any of them would want a sweaty, ignorant jock like you? Trust me, no one there will want your ass."

"Why wouldn't they want me?" His droopy eyes gave me a blank stare. "Look at me."

"Someone loves themselves," he mumbled, making Naruko laugh.

"I could pull a guy if I wanted to." What the hell was I saying?

"Yeah?" Sasori smiled. Again, that look crept me out. "Care to make a wager?"

"What kind of wager?" I asked sceptically.

His smile grew. You couldn't really call it a grin or a smirk. I didn't even think he could form a grin or a smirk. His smile was creepy enough. "I bet that you couldn't last the whole two weeks and pull a guy."

"Why would I WANT to pull a guy? That's just stupid."

"Just because you know you can't do it."

I wasn't one to back down from a bet… but this? "Okay, but if I do it, I want a date."

Sasori looked at me and raised a red eyebrow. "Sorry, jockstrap, I already have my eye on someone."

"Not with you, your older sister. She's hot." I paused to think. "She's not a lesbian, is she?"

"Being gay isn't hereditary, dumbass."

"Well, can you set that up or not?"

He sighed. "You want a date with Tenten? I didn't think she'd be your type."

I laughed. "She's the only girl in my grade who won't give me a chance, meaning she's the one I want."

"You're an idiot."

"Can you do it or not?" I asked, crossing my arms.

He thought about it for a moment, before standing up and extending his hand toward me. "I'm sure I can sort something out. But if you don't do it, then you have to go to your first football practice of next year in a skirt."

Wait a minute… a skirt? No, it didn't matter, I wasn't going to lose. I took his hand and shook. "We have ourselves a deal."

"Good," Sasori said, squeezing my hand with a small force. "Maybe you'll actually learn something."

* * *

All I could say is that I was glad I hadn't unpacked my things AGAIN. At least it'd only taken me four hours to get to the campsite this time. Driving at six am in the morning could've been the reason for the easy drive, though. I hadn't been able to sleep, anyway. I'd tossed and turned all night, and I was beginning to regret this bet thing. How the hell was I going to pull a guy, and what would I do if I did?

I sat in my car, staring out at the camp, and my head fell, smashing against the wheel and blowing the horn -- signalling my arrival. A knock on the window grabbed my attention, and I lifted my head from the horn and blinked sluggishly up at Naiya. The look on his face showed his confusion. I pushed a button which scrolled the window down.

"Naruto?"

"Hey," I smiled meekly. "I'm back."

"I can see that," he said, looking down at me through the open window. "Why?"

Why? Why? I was asking myself that very question. "I was thinking about what you said, and perhaps I should see how things go." Yup. I was going to hell.

He beamed. "That's wonderful news." He stepped back from the car's door so I could get out. "Perhaps I should inform you of your duties here before you settle in this time?" He laughed. Yeah, perhaps that was a good idea. I mean, if there turned out to be something I didn't like and wanted to leave again, I wasn't packing up my bags. AGAIN!

I pushed the car's door open and stepped out before locking the car up and following him. He led me toward the camp, holding his hands behind his back as we went. "You'll probably find that you're the youngest counsellor here," he began. "Since the ages for this camp is between thirteen and seventeen, at eighteen you're not that much older than the campers themselves. So, usually I don't get anyone under twenty be a counsellor, but as you'll also find out, there isn't many helpers this year." I nodded, showing that I was listening. "You'll be staying with your own group throughout the two weeks here and make sure there isn't any sort of accident. In other words, you're the grown-up for the next two weeks, and I expect you to act like one. Do you understand?"

"Yeah, that's fine," I said, looking around. "Where is everyone?" There were no teenagers or counsellors running around or getting up to mischief.

"Everyone's in their cabins at the moment. I've made sure that they all write home to tell their parents know that they're all settled in. Some parents are very sentimental, you see." He laughed. "It's always best to put their minds at ease. Plus, it's a great way to get to know each other. Since they're going to be with each other for the next two weeks, they might as well start off on the right foot. And because of that reason, you'll all be staying around your own cabins today until tonight when we have our first campfire of the two weeks."

"Okay, that sounds cool. So, basically I just baby-sit them and make sure they don't end up getting themselves killed over the next two weeks?"

"Pretty much. Since this isn't a camp for little children, you shouldn't have too much to handle. And if you have any problems, don't hesitate to come and see me or one of the other counsellors."

Now all I had to do was worry about this stupid bet. I was guessing getting the one who believed she was a guy in a girl's body wouldn't be enough. I sighed as I strolled back the way I had yesterday, over the logs and up to the wooden cabin. I'd grab my stuff later, it wasn't going anywhere, after all. The quicker I got to know these people, hopefully, the quicker these two weeks would go.

I tapped lightly on the cabin's door with my knuckles and walked in before anyone answered. There they were, sitting on their bunks, staring at me. I fought off the urge to shiver and entered the small hut to collapse back on the empty bunk below the red-haired boy's.

"Well, look who decided to return," Saku said, putting down a notepad and pen. Her knees bunched as she rested on a pillow against the wooden headboard. "Where the hell have you been?"

Just smile, Naruto. You left something at home and had to go get it. Telling the truth wouldn't earn me any brownie-points, and I had to think about the bet. "I left something at home. I had to drive back and get it."

"What did you forget?" The bug-eyed guy whose bed was above Saku's asked. "Oh, sorry, how rude of me. Your personal possessions are your own business. I'm lee by the way." He grinned. That was the dude who thought he was a lesbian -- was that even possible?

"Hey," I mumbled. Act nice. Smile.

"You look like your in pain," the guy who resembled Sasuke and lay on a top bunk of his own. He wasn't wearing lipstick today, just a headband which pushed his black strands behind his ears.

I am, I thought. It was true, I was in deep emotional pain. This was the sort of thing I'd be telling my psychiatrist in the future. Be nice, Naruto. Oh, there went little angel Naruto. Three inches high and standing on my left shoulder. "What's your name?" I asked the weirdo.

"Sai," he said without even looking at me. He scratched the side of his face with the eraser on the tip of his pencil.

I knocked the wood above my head. "And what about you up there? Do you have a name?" I stood from the bed and peered over the side of his. His teal eyes bore down on me.

"Gaara," he mumbled.

"Well, Gaara. Nice to meet ya. Aren't you going to write a letter home like the others are?"

His arms were crossed without a notepad and pen in sight. "And why would I want to do that?" He turned his nose up at me and looked away as if I wasn't even there.

"Because it's supposed to be sentimental or something."

"Sentimental? To who?"

I shrugged. "To your family, I guess."

His back hit the mattress as he lay down and turned away. "I don't have anyone who would find a letter from me sentimental," he said. "It's a pointless exercise, anyway."

I rolled my eyes. "Fair enough." Mr. over-emotional. "It's only a letter, anyway."

Silence echoed around the cabin. Seriously, how does silence echo? I didn't know but it sure as hell was doing a damn good job at it. This was supposed to be time to get to know everyone else in the cabin, I guessed it was up to me to start the ball rolling -- I was the 'grown-up', after all. I didn't even know how much older I was to these guys. "So…" I said after almost three hours of staring up at the wooden beams of the bunk above mine. "How is everyone?" Damn, that was lame.

"Bored," Sai said. He'd already spent the three hours in front of a mirror applying lip-gloss, eye-shadow and mascara. He flipped open a little pocket mirror and played with his hair. He reminded me of the cheerleaders back at my school. He probably would've fitted in fine with them.

"Well, what do you sort of people do for fun?"

"Us sort of people?" Lee asked with a blink. "We do exactly the same thing as everyone else." At least he wasn't dressing his face up with shit.

"We could go check out the chicks around this place," Saku said. Now, this girl I could get on with.

"You shouldn't speak so insensitively about women. They are delicate creatures who should be shown respect towards," Lee said. "As a fellow lesbian, I would've hoped that you would think better towards them."

"Dude," Saku said. "You're straight. You're a guy who likes girls… and I'm not a lesbian."

"I am a male lesbian, and--"

"You do know what lesbian means, right?" Sai added, shutting the pocket mirror and tucking it in his shoulder bag.

"Of course I do," Lee said.

This conversation was so messed up -- I think it's time to change the subject. "Uh, well, what do you guys want to do? I mean, we still have hours until the campfire, and we're supposed to be bonding or some shit."

"You've never been a counsellor before, have you?" Gaara's voice came from above me.

"Uh… no."

"I suspected as much."

And that's pretty much how the conversation died. I had no idea what I was doing.

* * *

**Next Chapter tomorrow… maybe…**


	4. Chapter 4

**Wow. I'm just spewing these chapters out.**

**Thanks for my lovely reviews, people. They're much appreciated.**

* * *

When the sun started setting over the trees, I left the cabin and the occupants inside to their own devices -- which, by this point, I didn't care if those devices were murdering each other. So much for bonding, every one of them except the red-haired dude seemed to have malicious intent toward one another.

I shook my head, letting the cool breeze of the evening ghost over my skin. The other counsellors within the camp seemed to be setting up the fire, so I climbed down the wooden steps to join them -- anything to escape that stuffy cabin.

"Hey," I said once standing beside the wooden logs.

"What's up?" one of the older counsellors with silver hair said, smiling behind a black mask which covered his mouth and nose. "You must be the youngster Naiya was telling us about earlier. I'm Kakashi."

"Yeah, that's me," I said, picking up a small twig which had fallen out of the stack of wood. I threw it in the pile.

He laughed. "I could've mistaken you for one of the campers. He wasn't lying when he said you were young."

I sat on one of the logs. "Well, I didn't have much of a choice coming here."

He nodded. "Yes, I heard about your little escapades in Iwa High. You were the only one caught, huh?"

I snorted. "Hmm, and unfortunately grassing isn't my forte."

The pieces of wood in the fire stood and leaned against each other to form a triangle. This obviously wasn't the first time he'd built a fire. He nudged my shoulder, making my body rock slightly. "Hey, chin up. It's not that bad here."

I pushed his hand away. "Yeah, I know that, but it's summer vacation, and I'd rather be spending it back home."

He laughed. "Missing parties?"

"You could say that."

"Don't worry too much about it. I'm sure you'll have a great time here once you've gotten used to it." He sat on the log beside me and stared at the wood as I was.

I shrugged. "I doubt it. The people in my cabin seem to want to spend all their time arguing."

He laughed, rubbing the side of his face. "That's natural, I guess." He sighed. "They probably spend so much time protecting their dignity that they're going to be very defensive. Put a whole group of defensive teenagers together, and that's what you get."

Defensive? What the hell would they have to be defensive about? "Is the same thing happening in your cabin?" I asked.

"The same thing happens every year. Don't worry, it never lasts long. It's the reason Naiya makes them spend the first two days in the cabin together. You know, gives them the chance to get to know each other."

I guessed that made sense.

As the sun completely disappeared behind the trees, _happy_ campers began appearing at cabin doors. I gazed over my shoulder, looking toward cabin four. My Cabin. Saku was sitting on the steps with her knees pointing opposite ways as she rested her forearms on them. She rubbed at the side of her nose before letting her hands hang. Jesus, she really did believe she was a guy. Perhaps I should've told Naiya I had a girl in my cabin. Sai stood on the platform of the cabin, leaning on the railings and filing his nails before lifting them up in the dim light to watch them gleam. Lee emerged from the cabin next, pulling on a green jacket. Poor guy, he was probably the most messed up -- I'd concluded that he had a bad upbringing; perhaps an overbearing mother. That seemed to be the answer to everything.

Someone's gay -- overbearing mother.

Someone killed themselves -- overbearing mother.

I rubbed at my chin, that gave me a good idea. The next time my English teacher asked where my homework was -- you guessed it -- 'sorry, sir. Overbearing mother.' He'd pat my head and nod understandingly.

Naiya appeared at the campfire and blew some sort of horn -- must've been the homo horn, since all the campers began leaving their cabins and seating themselves around on the logs. The fire was lit and the flames began dancing, sending oranges and reds over the faces of the teenagers sitting around it. He wasn't kidding when he said they were a minority. There were only thirteen people sitting around -- I'd heard camps usually held twenty-five to fifty people. But then again, like I'd mentioned before, I wasn't the best person to ask about camps. This was my first time at one, after all.

"Now, campers," Naiya said as he held a flag with rainbow patterns on it. "For those of you who were here last year, you know what we're about to play. For those of you newer members, we're going to pass this around." He held up the flag. "And those with the flag will tell their coming out story." There what story? Someone, God, Budha, Allah, I don't care who, just give me strength. "And we'll start the smorz." Smorz? That I could handle.

The sticky marshmallow clung to my fingers as I popped my fourth smor into my mouth. We'd already passed most the campers. I'd had to sit through some mushy stories about 'first loves' and some more exciting ones about girls kissing other girls in locker rooms. Now, those ones I didn't mind listening to.

The rainbow flag landed in my lap when someone flung it across the fire. I lifted it with smor-y fingers. "Well," I began. "I realized I was into girls when I was about, I dunno, born." I dumped the now sticky flag into the guy's lap who sat beside me. Someone serious had to clean that thing now. If they pulled it out next year with white sticky stuff all over it, wrong conclusions may be made.

The dude beside me with the strange tattoo on his forehead gazed down at the flag in his lap before lifting it with tight fingers. He seemed to be trying to burn holes into it before passing it quickly to the girl sitting next to him.

"Hey," Saku said, pointing a finger at Gaara who stared back at her with a bored expression plastering his face. "You didn't tell your story."

"So?"

"So, everyone else did. Even Naruto told his pathetically straight story."

Gaara crossed his arms, letting his pale fingers slide between his small biceps. "Perhaps I don't want to broadcast my business to everyone here."

"Fine, whatever," Saku said. "It's only a game."

The girl beside Gaara began her story, and I watched as Gaara looked down into his lap. He played with his fingers, twisting and turning them before squeezing them tight and standing.

"Hey, where're you going?" I asked.

"Away from here," he mumbled, stepping over the log and walking back toward the cabin.

Naiya caught my eye when I turned back to the fire, and he nudged his head in the direction of Gaara's retreating back. Oh, that was right. He was my responsibility. I sighed when I realized I'd have to go after him. I stood and excused myself before following the slim figure heading back to cabin four. "Hey, wait up," I called, jogging slightly to stand by his side.

He paused momentarily and looked back over his shoulder at me before carrying on. I caught up to him and stuffed my hands into my pant's pocket. "You okay?" I asked, tilting my head forward so I could peer into his face.

"I'm fine. I just felt tired. You don't have to follow me."

I cupped the back of my head as we strolled back to the cabin. "I'm not." I scrunched my face. "I just didn't want to listen to anymore 'coming out' stories." I laughed. "I just followed your lead in leaving. As a counsellor I couldn't be the first one to escape. This gives me the perfect excuse. So… thanks."

He rolled his eyes. "Whatever. You're a bit young to be a counsellor here, aren't you? You probably still don't know your ass from your elbow, so what makes you think you'd understand anyone here?"

Jesus, touchy. "Well, to be honest, I didn't really know what I was getting myself into." Perhaps I shouldn't have said that. "Don't get me wrong, it's not like this is the last place on earth I'd be or anything." He raised a light red eyebrow at me. Dropping my shovel now would've been a good idea. "It's just… never mind. I knew Naiya, sort of, so he offered me a counsellor position."

He opened the cabin's door and we both entered into the dark hut. There wasn't any electricity, so when the door shut, Gaara rummaged through a bag to pull out a flashlight. He clicked it on and the beam cut through the dark like a sword. He pointed it toward another one of his bags and pulled out a small box. "You smoke?" he asked, smacking the bottom of the packet. A cancer stick popped up and he pulled it out with his teeth before offering me one.

I waved my hand, and he pulled the packet back to drop it into his bag, shrugging.

"Coach doesn't agree with smoking. He says it disturbes our 'youthfully exciting' performance."

"What?"

"Don't ask. I swear he isn't all there in the head. You're not going to smoke that in here, are you?"

He pointed the flashlight in my face, making me scrunch my eyes. "Do I look like an idiot?" How the fuck would I know? I couldn't see anything with him pointing that damn light in my eyes. He turned it away and left the cabin with me trailing behind him. "What do you want now?"

"I'm your counsellor, I have to stay with you if you're going to be sneaking off to have a crafty smoke."

We circled the cabin and headed off toward the longer grass. "I know where I'm going," he said, climbing over the fence which was the perimeter of the camp. "I've been here before."

"You have?" I placed a hand on the wood to hop over. I didn't think we were supposed to be going this far out, but if he'd done this before then who was I to tell him to get back into camp. He probably wouldn't have listened to me, anyway.

"Should we be going this far out?" I asked when he headed toward the trees. The grass was getting longer, and I waded through it cautiously. The field was probably full of snakes… I hated snakes.

"Smoking is against the rules here since I'm underage. I don't want to get caught."

I looked over my shoulder, back toward the camp, an orange glow lit the area from the fire. "I don't think anyone's going to notice if you smoke it here."

"Having sex with a counsellor is also against the rules, so you should go back," he said bluntly.

"What--"

"I'm joking." This kid had one hell of a sense of humour…

I slowed my pace, trying not to make it too obvious that I didn't want to walk so close to him anymore. When we got into the trees he pulled a lighter out from one of his pockets and sparked the cigarette. He took a toke and breathed it out, letting it fly behind him and land in my face. I held my nose as we walked through the trees.

"Stop following me." His voice disturbed the silence.

The only light I could see was from the moon cutting through the leaves and the ember at the end of his cancer stick. "I'm not following you."

"You just happen to be walking in the exact same direction as me."

"… exactly."

"Whatever," he mumbled.

The trees thinned out and when we stepped out from the last of the canopy, I saw a small pond with grass and a few large boulders around it. The moon was in the water, catching on ripples as they moved across the surface. He climbed up onto one of the large rocks and leaned one arm behind him as he tilted his head up to let more smoke escape his lips.

"Did we really have to go this far out so you could smoke one cigarette?" I asked, sitting down on the grass.

"I thought you said you wasn't following me?" he asked after a moment of silence.

"You're my responsibility."

"You couldn't be responsible for a hamster," he said, looking out toward the water.

Seriously, what was this guy's problem? I was only doing my job. Naiya had basically told me to follow him, after all. If it were my choice I'd be back at home, probably banging some chick. Not sitting on a patch of grass next to a pond beside some faggot.

"I'm a football captain, I'll have you know. I'm responsible for a whole team back at home." There, that should shut him up, I thought as I nodded sagely.

"So you can baby-sit some airheads. Good for you." He took another drag before blowing the smoke toward the sky, letting it split in half as it came back down and blew past him in the light breeze.

"What the hell would you know about football?" We weren't just a bunch of 'airheads'. It took good organisation skills and stamina to be a captain of a football team.

He snorted and stumped the glowing stick out on the rock beside him. "I used to be on a football team. Like I said, all a bunch of airheads."

"You?"

He glared down at me. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing. I just didn't think people like you played football. Why'd you quit? Lose interest after you broke a nail?"

His mouth fell open and he narrowed his eyes before shutting it again to answer. "For your information, people like _me_ can enjoy participating in sports. It's not such a big deal."

"So what happened?"

He bunched his knees up and wrapped his arms around them. "Everyone found out, that's what happened. They found out and my coach basically told me he didn't want me contaminating the rest of the team. My so called team-mates agreed and I was dropped like yesterday's rubbish."

"That's harsh," I admitted. Your team-mates were supposed to have your back -- not literally in this case. It shouldn't have mattered what the reason was, even if in this case it would've been hard to see past the facts, your team-mates were your brothers.

He shrugged. "I was stupid to believe I'd be able to carry it on after my secret was busted."

"It still doesn't seem very fair, though."

He sighed and stood up on the rock. "That's how the world works. When you're different, you're not seen as human." He jumped down in front of me. His knees bent when his feet made contact with the ground, and he straightened himself up. "That's why you left, wasn't it?"

"What?" I said, stepping back slightly.

He snorted and turned away. "I saw the look of disgust on your face before you ran away. You had no idea what this place was." His face tilted back in my direction. "Did you? I just want to know, though, why did you come back?"

I was trapped under his gaze. The look in his eyes were keeping me prisoner as he scrutinized me. "That isn't the reason I left. I already said, I forgot something at home."

"Of course it isn't." He clicked his tongue off the roof of his mouth. "We should be getting back." He pulled his cell from his pocket and checked the time. "The campfire will be put out soon, and everyone will have to go to bed."

* * *

**Woop. Now Gaara's in it properly, I can start having some fun.**

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